April 27, 2004
Nerd Fu
In commemoration of yesterday's seeming interminable consecutive viewings of Kill Bill Vol. 1 and 2.
And in fullfillment of my promise to the Fu Crew, here's a link to a long list of movies the Kill Bill shouts out.
If one were to view every movie on this list I'm sure that one would achieve legendary, near unstoppable powers. I have no idea what those powers would be, but they'd have 'em.
April 24, 2004
The web is just a hack
And not even a really good one.
Here are a couple of articles about, you know, what, we do here.
with apologies for raiding rawbrick's remaindered links
And one more hack for good measure.
April 23, 2004
The MRML
Just in case you aren't as afraid of The Info-ninja as Michael Moore, an advance release of what we've currently got in development. You know, they've got four more detectives working on the case. They got us working in shifts.
--------------------------
A Guide to MRML
The Mind Reading Markup Language (MRML /mur'mul/) is a proprietary
extension of the HyperText Markup Language. This document, all MRML
tags, and any ideas you come up with while reading this information are
the exclusive property of the authors. This is an open specification
that
will be expanded as mind control technology is refined.
MRML tags can be embedded into any regular HTML document. They are
completely invisible to all browsers. No one will ever know you are
using them.
NOTE: MRML is not case sensitive. <fraud> is equivalent to <Fraud> or
<frAUD>.
Basic Markup Tags
The following MRML tags are used to read the client's mind for certain
kinds of thoughts and emotions about the contained text.
<BRAINSCAN>
Brainscan performs a light scan of the client's thoughts which may
include perceptions of their current environment. The Brainscan tag is
an
invaluable tool for establishing a user's identity as it is much more
reliable than checking REMOTE_HOST or USER_ID variables.
<THOUGHTSUCK>
Thoughtsuck performs of deeper scan of the client's thoughts which may
included details of significant events within the past 24 hours.
<DEEPFEARS>subject</DEEPFEARS>
Probes the client's mind for their fears about the contained subject.
<DEEPERFEARS>subject</DEEPERFEARS>
Probes the client's mind for their deeper, more repressed fears about
the
contained subject.
<DEEPESTFEARS>subject</DEEPESTFEARS>
Probes the client's mind for their deepest, most repressed fears about
the
contained subject. WARNING: This tag cannot be exported outside the US
borders.
<SEXTHOUGHTS>subject</SEXTHOUGHTS>
Probes the client's mind for sexual thoughts about the contained
subject. Use of the Sexthoughts tag will likely be deprecated with the
release of the Freud and Jung specifications.
Freud and Jung Tags
Specifications for Freudian id, ego, and superego tags and Jungian
symbolic tags are not currently available.
The HYPNOTIZE Tag
Current technology enables very primitive mind control using MRML tags.
The so-called Brainwashing tags are delimited by the special
<!--HYPNOTIZE><HYPNOTIZE--> pair. Suggestions within the Hypnotize area
are completely invisible to all clients, but it is extremely important
that the tags are placed correctly. You are liable for any mental
damages
inflicted by improperly placed tags.
HYPNOTIZE Area Tags
Within the <!--HYPNOTIZE></HYPNOTIZE--> area the following tags may be
used:
<SUGGEST>text</SUGGEST>
Used for mild, easily acceptable suggestions. For stronger suggestions
use
PROGRAM and BELIEVE. Some examples:
It is warm for this time of year.
You need to upgrade your computer.
Republican policies aren't all that bad.
<MEME>text</MEME>
Information that you want the client to pass on to friends and
correspondents.
Some popular memes:
Chain letters
Urban legends
Cool ascii graphics
<FORGET>text</FORGET>
Things you want the client to forget. It may be desirable to have the
client forget the URL of your MRML documents.
<PROGRAM>text</PROGRAM>
Programs the client with a strong post-hypnotic suggestion. There are a
few optional arguments. <PROGRAM TIMES=3 INTERVAL="1 hour" DELAY="2
days">
will trigger the suggestions three times at a one hour interval two
days
hence. <PROGRAM INTERVAL="after every meal" FOREVER> could trigger the
suggestion brush your teeth for an indefinite time.
Within the <PROGRAM></PROGRAM> area the following tags may be used:
<BELIEVE>text</BELIEVE>
Explicit thoughts to be planted in the client's mind. Beware of
contradictory programming! Try to remove previous conceptions before
reprogramming.
To reprogram someone that thinks that Pepsi is better than Coke:
1.<BELIEVE>You have no opinions about the relationship between
Coke and Pepsi.</BELIEVE>
2.<BELIEVE>Coke is better than Pepsi.</BELIEVE>
3.<BELIEVE>You are thirsty.</BELIEVE>
<BUY HREF=url>
Encourages the client to buy products on the World Wide Web. The
optional ITEM=item argument may be used.
<PASSWORD=keyword or phrase>
A convenient way to access the client's mind for future programming
sessions. Should only be used with a secure client-server connection.
Clarification: The BLINK Tag
The <BLINK> tag used in many popular browsers is not a MRML specified
tag.
Running Your Own MRML Server
The software needed to run a MRML-oriented server is freely available to
all persons and institutions. To obtain a copy of the server software a
representative for you or your company must attend a special 3-day
training session where they will be given the MRML software package.
These
training sessions are currently being held twice a month at an
undisclosed
location; requests for private training sessions will be considered.
April 22, 2004
Happy Birthday Rob!
Hey everybody!
It's our favorite blog keeper's birthday today! When you see him, be sure to pinch him and wish him a happy birthday!
April 20, 2004
What do you think about this?
Courtesy the Underlib
It started out innocently enough.
I began to think at parties now and then to loosen up. Inevitably
though, one thought led to another, and soon I was more than just a
social thinker.
I began to think alone -- "to relax," I told myself -- but I knew it
wasn't true. Thinking became more and more important to me, and
finally I was thinking all the time.
I began to think on the job. I knew that thinking and employment
don't mix, but I couldn't stop myself. I began to avoid friends at
lunchtime so I could read Thoreau and Kafka.
I would return to the office dizzied and confused, asking, "What is
it exactly we are doing here?"
Things weren't going so great at home either. One evening I had
turned off the TV and asked my husband about the meaning of life. He
spent that night at his mother's.
I soon had a reputation as a heavy thinker. One day the boss called
me in. He said, "Skippy, I like you, and it hurts me to say this,
but your thinking has become a real problem. If you don't stop
thinking on the job, you'll have to find another job."
This gave me a lot to think about.
I came home early after my conversation with the boss. "Honey," I
confessed, "I've been thinking..."
"I know you've been thinking," He said, "and I want a divorce!"
"But Honey, surely it's not that serious."
"It is serious," He said, lower lip aquiver. "You think as much as
college professors, and college professors don't make any money, so
if you keep on thinking we won't have any money!"
"That's a faulty syllogism," I said impatiently, and he began to cry.
I'd had enough. "I'm going to the library," I snarled as I stomped
out the door.
I headed for the library, in the mood for some Nietzsche, with NPR
on the radio. I roared into the parking lot and ran up to the big
glass doors . they didn't open. The library was closed. To this day,
I believe that a Higher Power was looking out for me that night.
As I sank to the ground clawing at the unfeeling glass, whimpering
for Zarathustra, a poster caught my eye. "Friend, is heavy thinking
ruining your life?" it asked.
You probably recognize that line. It comes from the standard
Thinker's Anonymous poster. Which is why I am what I am today: a
recovering thinker.
I never miss a TA meeting.
At each meeting we watch a non-educational video; last week it was
"Porky's." Then we share experiences about how we avoided thinking
since the last meeting. I still have my job, and things are a lot
better at home.
Life just seemed ... easier, somehow, as soon as I stopped thinking.
Soon, I will be able to vote Republican.
April 18, 2004
Summoner Geeks
This week's episode has been filmed entirely on location in NYC.
Coming to ya straight out of the Upper West side. Welcome to the humble abode of the rare, reclusive Dressler.
In the spirit of ALD's enourmous nerdom I bring you some funny meta-geek. Video game characters playing Dungeons and Dragons.
With thanks to Chhavi for finding this clip.
It is just too funny not to record here and send again.
http://www.ifilm.com/ifilmdetail/220487
April 16, 2004
Obligatory blog about blogging
I'm off to the NYC this weekend to check up on the long lost daddydress. I even might be able to convince his inimitableness to submit a guest entry. I know he's got quite a few in him.
Here's an article about blogging and Amazon to chew on.
The boisterous world of online literary commentary is many things. But is it criticism? (via Arts & Letters Daily)
April 15, 2004
The Thinkin' Man's Rap (Nerd Hop)
Okay, Check it, two rap websites. One Old Skool, the other decidedly New.
First, The Foundation
The history of Rap's Old School as told by interviews one Jayquan conducted with the artists themselves.
Especially check the Kool Moe Dee interview.
I've currently got Kool Moe Dee, KRS-One and the Getto Boys on heavy rotation. Gotta go get me some of that Mellie Mel.
And, now for something competely different.
The World's First HCI Rap: "We Got It", courtesy the guys at OK/Cancel.
Warning: Smart people wrapping, with like words and stuff, like written down and everything.
The mp3's okay, the lyrics are better than they sound.
Gotta check the comments.
You just gotta.
April 13, 2004
Metadata Rules! (And so do nerds!)
Just a little model of my favorite metadata scheme, the IEEE Standard for Learning Object Metadata, or 1484.12.1 (Click on picture)
Check out its majesty.
Man, so cool.
April 12, 2004
Food Porn
Via boingboing,
I have no idea what this really is, or means, but it kind of creeps me out. I hope it creeps you out too.
The Burger King Subservient Chicken
The BoingBoing posts:
And just for YellowRiver
April 10, 2004
From the Uber-nerd files: Metacrap
Just call me The Vengeful Info-Ninja.
I'm sorry, you're just gonna have to read the article to find out why.
The article is Metacrap, by Cory Doctorow, co-administrator of boingboing
Yes, I understand that I'm devoting an entire entry to people and articles that don't share my belief in the value of what I do. Our conflict lies at the junction of the public web (very shallow) with the "deep web" (huge silos of data, datasets, journal articles, learning objects). These articles discuss the application of metadata to the public web, where Google has correctly chosen to leverage the semantic connections (link choices) of its users because the lowest common denominator rules. If porn comes up highest on a search its because that's accurately a reflection of what the majority of people are searching for with that search string. I'd be willing to bet that Google has to significantly change its approach as it gains access to academic and similar repositories of content resulting from intellectual inquiry.
Other sites of interest:
Rawbrick on the Semantic Web (One) (Two)
Caveat Lector on the Semantic Web (One) (Two) (Three)
Clay Shirky on The Semantic Web
Finally, The Semantic Web
April 09, 2004
Vegas baby, Vegas
Courtesy "The Boston Sports Guy," my favorite sportswriter of all time.
He's a Boston product, went to Holy Cross, worked for the Globe, started a website, got picked up by ESPN Page2, became a household name among the ESPN set (that's me), and then jumped over to become a writer for the Jimmy Kimmel Live show. He still occassionally submits these unbelievably amazing stories for Page2 (one day they'll put him in charge of ESPN6 and Sports and Entertainment Television will never be the same, it will actually be entertaining, and sportsy).
Anyway, I've been harassing The Kenj with these stories for the better part of a year now. So, enjoy your first installment.
Destructive things with no guilt.
I know you'll want to do more reading, so here's the Archive.
And just because the nerd in me can't resist, a Sports Guy Index. I assure you I did not create the index, though that's likely only due to a lack of free time.
April 05, 2004
Riding through the Death Zone
Courtesy the Underlib,
or how to get your speed on, without attracting the attention of the local authorities.
April 02, 2004
More BAZZLE DAZZLE on "The Web"
If Basilia keeps insisting on making appearances on "Metametametadata" we're just going to have to give him his own "Web Log" (heheh, I said "Log").
Go check out his new "Website" to see examples of his artwork. Very cool, Basil.
And thanks, for the link to my site.
Here's the link to Baz's site,
http://www.terracottawarriors.xbuild.com/